Pen'D Poem: March 10 - 17

Vulnerability

I am afraid
All tears drip sore
I’m tired of being the man I am when people just still don’t seem to understand
It hurts to breathe inside knowing you’ve been ignored
Prayers silenced, Dreams cut short
Life is the vessel and the mission is living
Spirit low on fuel and my mind screaming abort

Just living to be…
Lightly treading emotional minds
Losing sight of my own feelings
While recognizing that others don’t see mine
Some love for love and that’s the reason for their pursuit
Not realizing that everyone loves differently.
Too impatient to wait it out and see what time brings you.
Damn shame,…
Many possibilities, many names
Afraid of river of time repeating itself with Shai
And it’s the hurt I carried before the stars ever came.
When I walked in on a cheating wife
Kids sheltered by the door,… muffling their mother’s moans
And I got to keep my cool because the laws says that’s what right
Gave up my home, Found sanctuary in being alone
Suffering the greed of a Amateur Queen
Making it harder to be a father and it’s what the Courts condone
If I lacked the strength to take responsibility
Displaying the absence of man within me
I would be indicted by my own mind
And the sentence would be befitting,
But since the day of the first birth,
I have stood firm in the dirt
Now fighting bitter smiles and uneven scales
Trying to prove to a Judge that’s blinded by a skirt
Watched a gavel fall
Stripping me of time with my earths
Made it difficult to move on
But I still knew my worth.
Took a few swings in the dark
Even had a connection with one
But she was quick to explore something different
I tried things slow, while she made her mark
Hesitant with every other
And who could blame this brother
Fire burns different than stars
So I observe the quick lovers.
And I am writing this
Because I fight with this
I don’t care about who reads or comment
Smile, frown or click button to like this shit
Opinions don’t move me
And it definitely doesn’t move my fright
I know that love don’t love me,..
Damn your opinions,…this is my life
Pouring my own sorrows
While sipping my own tears
Found comfort with few real friends
But everybody leaves and that’s been my fear.
So when ear hustling about the bad men
And all the evil men do
Think of the masses of men that do the right things
Only in their vulnerability can you ever see pass what you thought you knew….
(Sighs Oh Sorrow)….StarChasr


Copyright © 2013 Shai Carter (StarChasr)

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Much <3 SP